Feed the Demons

Do you know how deep your wounding runs?

During recent somatic healing work, I was not only taken into the palace of my personal wounds and their origin in this lifetime, but further back to the core of these wounds and the energies they hold within the collective unconscious.

I met a woman being burned at the stake and was told her name. Unknown to me at the time, this surname is of Gaelic origin and translates to “burned hero.”

I met an Oracle of Ancient Greece. The story that I was shown of her had a very different narrative to the one commonly told of the Oracle today.

Both women of power and wisdom, silenced and abused by the patriarchy.

Last night in my dream state I saw a man I knew pass me on the street, but when I called to him and met his gaze I saw that he was distorted, feral. He ran towards me, forcing me into the centre of a group of men who had materialised behind me. They were barbaric and demonic, the epitome of the dark masculine. Collectively they played with me like a game of cat and mouse, leaving me completely powerless and unable to escape their grasp. They had full control of me, and as I became lucid and began to transition back to the waking state, they transitioned with me, keeping me pinned to the bed unable to break out of the connection.

In this moment I felt myself connect to the wise women. I felt my power being taken away through eons, through the lives of the burned hero, the oracle and many others. But instead of trying to battle against the energy of the powerless feminine, I surrendered to it. I then brought my full awareness to the energy of the dark masculine that was very much present in my space and I surrendered to it too. And as I acknowledged this energy and said “I see and accept your darkness”, I began to gain control over it. Quickly I regained movement and declared full energetic ownership of my space.

As the internal energies were recognised, the external energies dissipated.

Just as the abused feminine is part of me, the dark masculine is also a part of me. These energies are within all of us and we cannot integrate them and move beyond them without meeting them, looking them in the eye and fully acknowledging and accepting their presence. As we fight to resist them, they only grow in power. Whether the wounds we hold are personal or archetypal, we must consciously choose to feed our demons.